Rainbow Road

History:

The original Grand Prix Racers struggled to come up with a culmination of their collective efforts. They eventually found a solution in the Sky - using their combined powers and the almost unlimited potential of Stars, they created the first Rainbow Road. They continued to operate in tandem for years, creating a truly non-partisan final course. After the turn of the Century though, this became unwieldy. With the growing popularity of Racers' personal tracks and investments it became difficult for them to join together to create the Rainbow Road. Still using Star Power, they decided to delegate its construction to a smaller committee.

SMK Rainbow Road in Mario Kart 7

In 2001 Bowser's presence was felt in Rainbow Road and he oversaw construction closely from his Floating Castle. In 2003 this fell to Mario and Peach who worked together using their formidable resources to construct the track floating over Mushroom City. Other parties, notably Bowser, resented this and in the next Tournament it fell to R.O.B. who had less of a bias. As R.O.B. did not participate in any other Grand Prix, Rosalina used her vast Galactic Powers to construct the next track in the fringes of the Mushroom World's Atmosphere. Finally, the latest track was overseen by the Honey Queen, who stepped in and used her wide sphere of influence to construct a track across the planets themselves. Lakitu, after decades of his species officiating the races also stepped in to revive the Original Rainbow Road course.

SMK:

Rainbow Road has been one of the most consistent conventions of the Mario Kart series. It always concludes the Special Cup and serves as the Final Course in the game and usually one of the more difficult. No Rainbow Road has any Offroad and they are always suspended in space or the sky, which means that there is a constant danger of falling into the abyss. SMK's Rainbow Road doesn't have the most difficult turns in the game and is completely flat, but its trickiness is precisely that: It is full of 90° turns that come right after long straightaways and with exactly zero guardrails the course is perilous indeed. There are also thwomps that smash players and a few narrower portions where it's easy to get knocked around (and off). Its rainbow portions make up a sort of tile on the track.

Like every course from SMK, this was re-made in Super Circuit. The course also returned in Mario Kart 7 to conclude the Lightning Cup, the Final Retro Cup. It is largely similar although now when the thwomps pound the shockwave makes the track bouncy. It is also one of only two courses (the other being N64 Luigi's Raceway) to have no Air or Sea portions. The Ghost is Lakitu. Using the Pipe Frame, Slim Wheels, and Super Glider, the Normal Staff Ghost goes 01:34.459. This could be advantageous, as his Drift, Mini-Turbo, and Handling are top-notch at the expense of speed.The Expert Ghost goes 01:21.994 using the Cloud 9, Roller Wheels, and Paraglider. The Roller Wheels play into both the Cloud 9's strengths and weaknesses. Still, neither Ghost has all that much speed. If you can get going and not fall off, it should be a cinch.

64:

I consider 64's incarnation of Rainbow Road to be the grandest of them all. It is by far the longest course in Mario Kart history, usually taking around six minutes to complete. It is the only Rainbow Road completely surrounded by guardrails but there is danger both from errant shells bouncing around forever on the course as well as from the hungry chain chomps that roll by to ruin a Driver's day. More than that though, with its grand hills, long straightaways, and extremely tight turns, the course offers a bit for every playing style. Without a tremendous amount of interruptions, it allows these playing styles to play out. That is, whoever wins Rainbow Road a true driving champion. It is also so extravagantly long that players have time to catch up if they get the right items, or conversely based on skill, time to create an impressive lead.

The track is in the reaches of space, like the version from SMK. There are neon images hovering above the track of each Racer, as well as some items like Boo and the Mushroom. The track itself is much smoother than SMK, comprised of horizontal bands of every major colour in the Rainbow.

This course returned to close out the Lightning Cup in Mario Kart 8. There are some other major differences, including the presence of air jumps near the start and finish as well as large portions of the track now transformed into anti-gravity sections. It's really a bastardized version, though, because it has been transformed from taking three laps to only one, similar to Mount Wario, the Wuhu Tracks, or the Rainbow Road from 7. This makes the course much easier, although there are now spots lacking guardrails, which makes things slightly tougher. The Chain Chomps also no longer roam like maniacs but merely bounce up and down, shaking up the course. The only other major geographical difference is that it now takes place over a city, similar to Double Dash, instead of in the middle of space. The rainbow itself is also tiled more similar to SMK than the clean strips we saw in 64. All in all, despite the anti-gravity sections being pretty awesome, it's a big step down.

The Ghost this time around is Metal Mario, a signifier of his other-worldly nature, but also very in line with both Mario and ROB being previous Ghosts of these tracks. He uses the Standard ATV for some insane reason, with Monster Tires and Super Glider. There's no reason to need that level of traction and almost anything is going to get you going faster. Handling is an issue here, use lighter weights sparingly.

Super Circuit:

The Super Circuit incarnation combines some elements from both SMK and 64. Its pattern is similar to 64 but with a brighter tone and it shares a large amount of tight turns, but the whole course is flat. There is also a fair amount of both guardrails and gaps to endanger Racers. There are boost panels for the first time, which tend to hinder novices but excite veterans. Some of these, as well as Mushrooms, can provide some significant shortcuts to blast through this course.

For the first time, too, the track is not in space but clearly in the night sky. Players drive by clouds, which can land on players, shrinking them down. Bowser's Castle is also a constant presence in the background.

Double Dash:

Rainbow Road started getting really crazy in Double Dash, living up to its status as the Ultimate Test of a Mario Karter's Mettle. Like Super Circuit it contains both stretches with guardrails and very dangerous unguarded portions that can lead to certain doom. It also brings back Dash Panels, the course is full of them, which can be dangerous or a benefit depending on a Player's skill level. While looking down on the course from above it may not seem like much but there are extreme changes in elevation that can make the course very difficult as it is full of spiral turns that require excellent driving to get through. There is also an enormous vertical boost, the only one of its kind.

The Track itself is suspended over Mushroom City, making it another course that is in the Sky and not Space. The course is almost panel like, and it glistens in faded Rainbow Colours that merge, blend, and reflect with each other. The track is also very bumpy, and green shells are virtually useless. There is the occasional Star that lands, however. Still, items like the Star or Golden Mushroom can prove more fatal than beneficial. Like 64 there are objects suspended across the course, this time each characters' Special Item. They are more three-dimensional than the 2-D Neon Glow of 64, though.

Double Dash only had one set of Staff Ghosts. The pair here are Mario and Peach, the only such Ghost Team of unnatural pairs. Using Mario's Red Fire they pull a 3:16:476. This makes it the longest course in the game. It is again a course that can fit many playing styles and mastering drifting while staying on the middle of the track will lead to success.

DS:

What appears as a simple Figure-8 is much more. The DS version of Rainbow Road features the only full Loop in Mario Kart History, as well as a difficult Spiral Track. In the vein of recent Rainbow Roads this track is full of Dash Panels and mixes guarded sections with difficult sharp turns that offer no protection. The key here though, is both the Loop and the Spiral and players must be cautious about being hit with Blue Shells or Thunderbolts as they'll plummet to their doom.

The Track is back in Space although it has a blue rather than black hue, suggesting it may still be somewhere in the Upper Atmosphere. The course itself has vertical rather than horizontal bands of Rainbow Colours and looks more similar in tone to SMK than the brighter, faded hues of Double Dash or Super Circuit.

The Ghost here is R.O.B. in the R.O.B.-BLS who goes 2:16:246. R.O.B. is a weird robot and so fits the weirdness or the ultimateness of this course. This version requires good drifting ability as most of the straightaways are full of dash panels anyway, and the toughest parts in Time Trials are surely the turns and not the Loop. Many of DK's Karts such as the Wildlife and Rambi Rider have both high speed and drift and may be a good option. It is actually by a good margin not the longest track in the game, that distinction goes to Waluigi Pinball.

Wii:

This perhaps the craziest Rainbow Road, almost an unbelievable judgment. Like the courses from 64 and Double Dash it begins with a steep drop, although in this incarnation the drop is no hill but a sheer cliff. There are Boost Panels everywhere, along with spots to pull some tricks and many unguarded sections besides a few turns and the starting point. Its most distinctive feature may be the wavy section that drops down into a wide section of track punctured by two massive holes that lead to oblivion. Following this is a Star Warp that sends the players high above and across a great distance to the final third. It's similar to the Vertical Boost from Double Dash, but it travels horizontally a great deal as well.

The Course finds a median between Sky and Space and is clearly positioned very high in the Earth's Atmosphere. Players who fall off will begin to burn up in re-entry. Visible though, are moons, planets, bits of debris, and star bits floating around the cosmos. The track itself is similar to Double Dash, a reflective shimmering rainbow, although it is not as opaque or bleached out.

The Ghost here is Rosalina, reflective of her Galactic Status. The Normal Ghost appropriately uses the Shooting Star in 03:05.895 while the Expert switches to the Jetsetter in 02:44.734. Both do well in the hands of Rosalina. Karts are a bit more stable and perform better than Bikes here. Funky's speed applied to the Flame Flyer is a great option, but again, the course has bits to fit any playing style. In terms of length, the course barely beats Bowser's Castle to be the longest Original Track in the game but it is actually still shorter than the N64 version of Bowser's Castle, which closes out the Retro Tracks.

7:

The Final Rainbow Road to date is truly Galactic. 7 introduced the idea that courses could be only one lap, albeit a very long one. After Wuhu Loop and Maka Wuhu the last one-Lap track is this game's installment of Rainbow Road.  There are not as many drastic elevation changes, but there are extended Air Portions, multiple path choices, and a wavy road full of holes reminiscent of the Wii version. This time, however, players drop down to the surface of a Moon. Dash panels abound again, and one of the course's more distinct features may be a long Rainbow Tube that doesn't quite do what the Spiral in DS did.

The Course is truly in space. For the first time Players can drive not only on bits of Rainbow but the rings of a Saturn-like Planet as well as what appears to be the surface of a moon. There a a few places to catch some Air, the longer of which is full of Asteroids to dodge and Star Boosts to hit to keep up Air Travel. Failing to hit these can lead a Driver to either the course below or death. The track itself is a swirl of colours that evokes the vertical pattern of DS but gives it a greater swirl like Wii.

The Ghost here is the Honey Queen, perhaps due to her status as Intergalactic Royalty. The Normal uses the Birthday Girl, Slim Wheels, and Peach Parasol in 02:10.090 . This is a pretty good choice, but the Peach Parasol is egregiously slow in the air. The Expert switches to her own Bumble V, Standard Wheels, and Flower Glider in 01:52.077. This is again solid, although the Glider can definitely be upgraded. There are more turns, gaps, and last-minute decisions to be made her than a need for raw speed. The greatest straightaways are through the air, so pick someone with good handling and drift that maintains velocity in the Air. Something like the Bumble V, Cloud 9, or Pipe Frame, along with the Sponge or Wood Tires ought to do the job.

8:

The Rainbow Road here returns to much of what made the Wii Rainbow Road great - set high in space with the Earth down below, with insane, impossible turns, split sections, and a massive air boost. Like 7, though, there is also some significant sections where no rainbow is traveled on, instead there exists a massive orbiting space station with shifting directional paths. It's also notable for being the only Rainbow Road with a small patch of Off-Road, though. It's completely allergic to barriers, and very easy to fall off when zooming along with anti-gravity. Anti-gravity, by the way, was made for this course, and it employs them perhaps better, or at least more extensively than any other course in 8.

Depending on your comfortability with that, you'll surely want someone with proper handling that won't fall into the abyss. The Ghost here is Pink Gold Peach, who uses the Comet, Slim Tires, and Super Glider. That's a damn fast combination but you can use the Slick Tires to get that anti-gravity speed up and perhaps someone with less weight for better handling during those deadly turns. The use of Peach in her Pink Gold diecast here may be a reference to her Ghost from Double Dash, along with the use of Metal Mario in the 64 Rainbow Road.

Lakitu

History:

Green-Shelled Lakitus had for years served as the Marshals of the Grand Prix. They provide all officiating, including starting races, telling drivers when they're going backwards, and fishing them out of hazards or out-of-bounds areas. The Lakitus, normally enemies of Mario, agreed to be arbitrators in the Grand Prix because of their convenient ability to float and lift things, as well as their non-judgmental and impartial nature.

Tho these Green-Shelled members of the Lakitu Race were normally adversarial and strictly nonpartisan, a Red-Shelled Lakitu took it upon himself to enter into the actual Driving of the 2011 tournament. Such an act was unprecedented in the Lakitu community and he faced many trials and harsh words, as being non-bias observers and aides in the Grand Prix had become something of a staple in Lakitu Society. He faced exile from the Giga Lakitu himself, although his fat corruption by that point had known no bounds. Nevertheless, Lakitu found his way onto the Track, helped construct the Piranha Plant Slide with his allegiance with the Koopas, and even resurrected an ancient version of Rainbow Road using his Lakitu access to the Grand Prix Archives.

7:

Lakitu makes an odd appearance as a Driver in Mario Kart 7. He has a Red Shell to distinguish himself from other Evil Lakitus as well as the impartial Race Judge Lakitus. The Racers in 7 are divided into five weight classes of equal stats. In addition to this, each racer has his or her own signature Kart, though they are free to use any of the sixteen Karts, ten sets of wheels, and seven gliders, which makes a ridiculous number of possible combinations. Here we examine just one of those combinations that works well with Lakitu's class, the Featherweights, and his classic ride, the Cloud 9.

As a Featherweight, his stats are equal to Toad, Koopa, and Shy Guy. He excels at Sea Speed, Acceleration, Handling, Off-Road, Mini-Turbo, and Drift at the expense of Land Speed and Weight. These are a lot of advantages, but may not fit every playing style or course. The Cloud 9 is a good Kart that emphasizes the Featherweights, lacking Land Speed and Weight, but boosting everything else. To this we added the Mushroom Tires. Anything else would make its dismal Top Speed much lower, sacrifice its excellent underwater and aerial Speed, or rob it of some other advantage it needs over Off-Road. Its acceleration and handling stay high while its this stat plummets but doesn't become unbearable. This combo works in tracks with lots of Air and Sea travel, such as Cheep Cheep Lagoon, Koopa Cape, Piranha Plant Slide, Wario's Shipyard, and Koopa Troopa Beach. It can handle its own on land, but ultimately this is an aquatic vehicle now.

Lakitu, like all the other Drivers in 7, has two Staff Ghosts on two Tracks in Time Trials. His first is on Piranha Plant Slide where the Normal Staff Ghosts uses the Standard Kart, Monster Tires, and Super Glider in 02:20.186. The Expert switches to Lakitu's signature Cloud 9, with Sponge Tires, and Paraglider in 02:06.540. Neither takes advantage of the undersea ability of the Cloud 9. His second is on the retro SNES Rainbow Road, which he gets for being kind of an other-worldly, significant entry as a driver, considering the storied history of his species and Mario Kart. He goes 01:34.459 in the Pipe Frame, Slim Wheels, and Super Glider. His Drift, Mini-Turbo, and Handling are going to be excellent, although his speed will heavily decrease. If you can pull off a faster racer while staying on the track you can beat him. The Expert does 01:21.994 using the Cloud 9, Roller Wheels, and Paraglider. The Roller Wheels overemphasize the Cloud 9's strengths, as well as its weaknesses. While it will be a technologically efficient machine, again, its speed will be shot, take it down by not falling off.

Honey Queen

History:

For eons the Queen of all Bees has held dominion over the Bee Diaspora throughout the Universe. The Honey Queen is their unquestioned Lord, as she is the Mother of all Bees. She hails from the Honeyhive Galaxy, a close neighbor to the Mushroom Galaxy. She has been a longtime ally to Rosalina and the Lumas and more recently encountered Mario on his Interstellar Journeys. As the thrill of the Grand Prix has been exposed on a more Universal scale, the Honey Queen became intrigued. She was able to join in the 2011 Tournament and even put up a planet in her galaxy for a Battle Arena.

7:

The Honey Queen is an interesting addition to Mario Kart 7. Likely it was part of a goal to well-represent Female Characters better, which is commendable. She is a Heavy character, making her the largest Female in the series to date, dwarfing Rosalina who is of the Cruiser Class now. Each Class in 7 has identical stats, meaning she possesses the same base as Bowser, Wario, and Metal Mario. The Heavyweights have exceptional weight and speed, but lack everything else in comparison to other classes. In addition to this, there are sixteen different Karts, most of which are associated in some way with a particular Driver. To add to this intense customization are ten different sets of Wheels and seven different Gliders, all of which affect stats, making any Racer fairly customizable to fit any playing style. For now we've taken the Queen's signature Kart, the Bumble V for a closer look:

The addition of Wood Tires and the Paraglider make the Queen ready for any circumstance. She has above average stats in just about everything here and excels most at handling, especially in Sea and Air, as well as Off-Road, Drift, and Mini-Turbo. She's therefore ready for the most difficult courses and can recover quickly in any situation. This lack of specialization makes this combination less useful in courses without Off-Road or plenty of straightaways, such as Neo Bowser City, but lets her take control on tracks like Cheep Cheep Cape, Piranha Plant Slide, and Bowser's Castle.

Every character has two Staff Ghosts on two Courses in Time Trial Mode. The Honey Queen appears on the Original Rainbow Road in the Royal Ribbon with Slim Wheels and Peach's Parasol in 02:10.090. She'll have the best of both worlds with speed and handling, tho her parasol will slow her down in the air, which Rainbow Road can have plenty of. She switches to her own Bumble V with Standard Wheels and the Flower Glider in 01:52.077. This combo will almost do the same thing, with a bit less oblique speed. She has that touch of intergalactic novelty and royalty that makes her a good fit here.

Her second Ghost is at the Retro Coconut Mall, which I guess is girly enough for the Big Bee. She does a 02:30.117 using the Standard and Slim Wheels again, but this time uses the Super Glider, which means she won't lose air speed. The Coconut Mall doesn't require the handling the Slim Wheels provide and you can beat her with some speed. The Expert goes 02:14.167 in the Koopa Clown, Sponge Wheels, and Paraglider, which is great around the sharp turns here but again loses Speed.

Rosalina

History:

Rosalina is one of the most powerful figures of the Mushroom Galaxy. She started out as a mortal girl in the Mushroom Kingdom centuries upon centuries ago, older than even Lord Bowser. One day she was contacted by an emissary of the Lumas, supposedly looking for its mother. Unbeknownst to Young Rosalina, the Luma was lying, for its true intention was to obscond with Rosalina and make her into the new Mother Figure for the Luma people and by extension, the Galaxy.

As Rosalina began consuming the Star Bits of the Lumas her powers grew. The Star Bits linked her awareness to the cosmos and she eventually rose to become the Guardian Mother of the Universe, presiding over many galaxies and able to transport her Comet Observatory any where nearly instantaneously. For all her wisdom she has failed to realize the trickery of the Lumas, though she now accepts her role graciously.

Her first contact with Mario came when Bowser expanded his threat to the entire Universe and developed Space Travel. Since then she has become his ally, for her powers of teleportation, clairvoyance, and making bubbles are not adequate to deal with Bowser's Dominion, nor is her role to actively protect the cosmos, rather to silently watch for danger and then recruit a warrior. After Bowser was defeated she was perplexed to find that apparently in between Wars all these people do is race each other. She quickly joined the Circuit and has even begun to use her extensive abilities, contacts, and influence to design and procure her own Race Tracks.

Wii:

Rosalina is an outstanding Racer in Mario Kart Wii, though extremely difficult to unlock without a Super Mario Galaxy Save File on the same hard drive (which unlocks her automatically after 50 races). Each driver in this game is sorted into Three Separate Size Classes, each of which has access to Six Karts and Six Bikes of various stats. Additionally, each Character adds his or her own Bonuses to certain stats. It's notable that Rosalina is the first ever Large Female Character and does driver similar to a Big Daisy. She adds a moderate Speed, Handling, and Mini-Turbo Bonus, identical to Daisy, but more balanced (+3 in each instead of Daisy's +4/+2/+3). Her specific stats for each Kart are as follows:

She excels most with her signature Bike and Kart, the Shooting Star and Honeycoupe, respectively. Both are fairly balanced with favours toward Speed and Mini-Turbo. It makes Rosalina a danger in just about any circumstance although her acceleration and Off-Road may leave something to be desired. She therefore does best when she doesn't hit anything and stays on the path. She's a good character to get in front and stay there.

She has a single Staff Ghost in the game, claiming Rainbow Road as her home to go along with her mystic, cosmic origins. She first uses the Shooting Star in 03:05.895, while her Expert switches to the Jetsetter in 02:44.734. This is the longest of all the Original Tracks and Rainbow Road is arguably the hardest course in the game to Finish, let alone beat a Staff Ghost. Luckily among drivers there are options in any given style better than Rosalina so play to your strengths and style and beat her.

7:

Rosalina returns in Mario Kart 7, this time in the Cruiser Weight Class, one notch below the true Heavyweights. Is she really as big as DK or Wiggler? Sure. In 7 each Weight Class affects stats but the characters don't as much, meaning that she's essentially identical to both DK and Wiggler. Again, bizarre to think about. Each Kart adds or subtracts from these base stats but then players can additionally manipulate stats by selecting specific wheels or gliders. It's a dizzying way to customize a racing experience. For simplicity's sake we'll pair Rosalina with a Kart befitting her needs, in this case the Gold Standard. Its disadvantages in Air Speed, Acceleration, and Mini-Turbo are largely mitigated by the Roller Tires and Parasol. Just one of the many possible Rosalina combinations follows:

She also has one signature course in 7, the first explicitly Rosalina Track in the Mario Kart series, Rosalina's Ice World. It matches her frosty exterior and has a great deal of elements from the Super Mario Galaxy series, including visual references to the Cosmic Cove Galaxy and the Comet Observatory. With the combination set forth above Rosalina is above par in everything, albeit with a massive sacrifice in drift. This can be solved by using either the Slim or Wood tires as well as the Gold Glider.

She has two ghosts in the Time Trials of the game, as does every character. Her first, Music Park is kind of random, but it's a girly enough track. The Normal Ghost uses the Royal Ribbon, Roller Wheels, and Super Glider in 02:19.336, the Expert uses the Soda Jet, Slim Wheels, and Parafoil in 02:07.551. Her other Ghost is on her eponymous Ice World. The Normal goes 02:25.784 using the Standard, Sponge Wheels, and Parafoil while the Expert pulls a 02:13.091 using the Gherkin, Red Monster Wheels, and Super Glider.

R.O.B.

History:

R.O.B. the robot is an interesting case. Scholars in the Mushroom Kingdom are unsure of where exactly he came from but sources indicate that it is possible that he is a temporarily displaced in his own space-time, similar to how Master Hand is able to assemble fighters for the Super Smash Tournaments. R.O.B. does not originate from the Mushroom Dimension and so has no real ties or relationships to anyone else. He exists only to race, although he had some kind of natural connection to Rainbow Road, perhaps using his temporal displacement to help construct the similarly otherwordly track.

DS:

R.O.B. appears only as an unlockable character in DS for some reason. He really has no purpose being here but nevertheless he provides another good heavyweight character. The system in DS provides three unlockable signature Karts for each character, although every character may use any Kart. These include a standard, one with better stats but a weak Item rating and one with worse stats but a high Item rating. R.O.B. generally has excellent Speed, along with the best Acceleration and Handling of any Heavyweight. He is also tied with Bowser as the Heaviest driver, adding 3.5 to the weight of each Vehicle. This all comes at the expense, however, of his Drift, which is the worst in the game. Take a look:

There are also Staff Ghosts in DS. R.O.B. owns the Desert Hills track for some reason, with a time of 1:31:262 using the ROB.-LGS along with Rainbow Road in the ROB-BLS in 2:16:246. The Rainbow Road here makes sense, R.O.B. is a weird character for that weird track, but the Desert Hills is awfully random. Needless to say, R.O.B. did not make a comeback after this game.