Sunday, September 11, 2011

Dry Bones

History:

As Lord Bowser and his Major Domo, Kamek increasingly experimented with Dark Magic, they became obsessed with ideas of immortality. As Bowser encountered King Boo in the Boo Woods his interest turned not towards extending life but towards defeating Death. After countless Dark Magic trials on the innumerable Koopa Bodies robbed of life by Mario he perfected his skeletal fighting force - the Dry Bones. They aren't exactly zombified flesh-eaters but rather reanimated bones heavily resistant to heat and physical damage. In an effort to create a more loyal follower than Koopa or Paratroopa to race alongside him, Bowser invited the most worthy Dry Bones to race in the 2005 Grand Prix and he has been there ever since.

DS:

Dry Bones debuted as the only Lightweight Secret Character in DS. That game has an interesting system. Each Character slowly unlocks Three Signature Karts with varying stats - one average, one worse, but with a good Item Rating, and one that's excellent but with a low Item Rating. Eventually though, all Twelve Characters can access all 36 Karts, making for a crazy amount of combinations. Characters in different Karts don't change stats besides their initial Weight Class. Dry Bones adds nothing to the weight of any Kart, making him the Lightest in the game. Dry Bones' initial Kart Offerings are thus:


His Acceleration and Handling are among the best in the game. In fact, the Dry Bomber is the only Kart with a perfect 10 in both of those categories. His drift is slightly below average, but his speed is really awful. The Banisher has by far the Worst Speed in the Game. Still, the Dry Bomber is an excellent choice for anyone in Grand Prix.

Dry Bones' Ghosts in every game have only featured on Retro Tracks. features as a Staff Ghost on two Courses. He finishes the Donut Plains 1 with the Dry Bomber in 1:08:027, possibly alluding to his dryness. He's also in the 64 Banshee Boardwalk with the same ride in  2:14:403, a clear reference to his spookiness.

Wii:

Wii featured Three Size Classes who each had access to Six Karts and Six Bikes of varying stats. Each Individual Character also has his or her own Bonuses that add to certain stats. Dry Bones again has an Acceleration Bonus as well as a Drift Bonus but he really excels at Mini Turbo. His +6 is tied for the highest in the game and when using the Bullet Bike he ties with Koopa as the highest Mini Turbo Stat available. Here are his specific Stats:


The Bullet Bike is also the closet thing he has to a Signature Kart because its colour scheme fits Bullet Bill's actual colour scheme when Dry Bones uses it. You should use that Kart with Dry Bones for sure, it's one of the better Small Vehicles and Dry Bones makes it better. His Bonuses favour a very specific style of play, though, one that relies on managing tricky turns and corners with plenty of drifting and control. It can be advantages for complex courses in the hands of experienced racers.

His one Ghost appears in the Retro Desert Hills. Not only is it a course from his original Kart Game, DS, it's a very dry course. Dry Course? Dry Bones. It's all coming together. The Normal Ghost uses the Standard Bike S in 02:10.233, the Expert upgrades to the Tiny Titan in 01:52.686. That Kart only nominally takes advantage of Dry Bones' Bonuses. Switch to the Bullet Bike and take him down.

Yoshi Circuit

History:

As Yoshi's personal wealthy blossomed from his partnership with Mario he also sought to expand his investments. He sank a tremendous amount of money into an island off the shore from his own Yoshi's Island, converting it into a Racetrack. Not only that, he reshaped the Island to resemble his own silhouette, as well as imported asphalt to pave it like a Circuit Track. Even though it was popular the construction of Yoshi Circuit bankrupted Yoshi for a time. He was forced to sell Desert Hills to Waluigi and give up the rights to the Dry Dry Desert just to cover his losses. For his expenses though, Yoshi Circuit has just recently broken even for Yoshi and it remains his proudest possession.

Double Dash:

This is one of the more dangerous Circuit Tracks in the Mario Kart Games. It's a Circuit Track because it's basically pavement between grass around a relatively simple loop. It's just that this loop is shaped exactly like Yoshi, which is much harder than would appear. There are plenty of shortcuts straight through some of Yoshi's bumpier parts as well as some good drifting places around his tail and feet. All in all there is, like any other Circuit Track, a good amount of straightaways and tough turns. There's probably more of the former than the latter, especially late in the course, meaning a Heavier Kart may be more effective, particularly towards the end of the race. Of course there is always the notion that Blue Shells are always lurking, but that's going to screw you up anywhere. Your left side will almost always be rubbing against Ocean, but it's pretty easy to stay on dry land, even with Big Karts butting around.

Double Dash had Secret Staff Ghosts for every Course in Time Trials. The Ghost here is Yoshi, of course, driving Birdo around in the Turbo Yoshi with a time of 1:59:886. The track also reappeared in DS with some minor cosmetic differences. It's actually the Final Track in the game, coming at the end of the Retro Lightning Cup. The Ghost is Yoshi again, in the Standard YS at 1:48:793.